Selection and application counseling

School selection and application counseling is a comprehensive service that begins in late summer or early fall. I think of the process as one that comprises four major steps, with a number of smaller stops along the way.

1. Information meeting and suggestions. I meet with families and students to gather extensive information about how you think about education and schooling, what’s important to your child, and whether there are must-haves and/or dealbreakers. From that conversation, I’ll generate a list of schools where I think your child can thrive. (Clients are free to modify that list at their discretion, of course. It’s a starting point for the work we’ll be doing.)

2. Standardized testing. Most schools require testing, such as the WPPSI, the WISC, and/or the SSAT or ISEE. We’ll talk about the impact of that testing on the admission process at various schools, and you’ll consider whether you’d like your child to undertake any formal preparation. Tests are generally administered in the fall.

3. School visits and interviews. You and your child will visit most of the schools to which they’re applying. I’ll provide counsel and strategy suggestions to parents and student for making the most of these opportunities.

4. The written application. Each school will ask for written reflections on various questions from parents, and from students applying (usually) to grade 5 and higher. We’ll talk about strategy for approaching these important parts of your child’s candidacy and how to achieve the most important tasks in the process.

In addition, selection and application includes the services listed below, as appropriate. (Not all families engage all services.)

• Interviews and conversations with parents (and with applicants to grade 4 and above)

• Review and discussion of grades and school reports

• Review and discussion of standardized testing and professional evaluations

• Discussions of schools identified by parents

• Discussion of advantages and disadvantages of boarding schools

• Recommendations for schools to consider

• Recommendations for additional testing and resources (if indicated)

• Recommendations for test preparation services

• Discussion of teacher recommendations

• Discussion of application calendar

• Evaluation of the likelihood of admission at particular schools

• Discussion and coaching on student school visits and interviews

• Discussion and coaching on parent school visits and interviews

• Complete review of applications

• Advising on unusual conflicts between schools

• Discussion of admission options after offers are received

• Strategic counsel on wait-list decisions

• Preparation for matriculation

• Other questions and concerns as they arise

Hourly Consultation

The process of applying to schools — at least for those who want to do it as well as possible — almost always takes several months. In my experience, it is hard for families to approach the process piecemeal and still feel like they have done the best job possible. For this reason, I give priority to working with families who are interested in engaging the whole process, rather than those looking for a bit of help here and there.

In limited situations, however, families have specific questions that require less discussion and planning than a full application process involves. For example, sometimes families begin the process later in the fall, after some deadlines and admission events have passed. If a full-service process doesn’t make sense, I am happy to discuss hourly billing.

Will i help your child find a “perfect fit”?

Probably not. Almost all students can find success at a range of different schools. Besides, students are not well served when they don’t encounter sufficient challenges or opportunities for adaptation and flexibility that are essential to growing up. When we remove age-appropriate obstacles from our children’s paths, we inhibit their development in two ways: First, we rob them of opportunities to develop coping mechanisms; and, second, we communicate that adults in their lives do not have confidence in them to solve everyday problems.

Instead of seeking one magic, perfect fit, I advise parents to search for options where their children can adapt and thrive. It is a rare family that never encounters a conflict with their school, especially over the long term. Instead of adopting the “one-ism” approach that’s common in school searches, I help families discover the advantages and disadvantages of various schools, and evaluate those attributes so they can make good, confident decisions.

CAN I HELP WITH A WAITLIST?

Counsel on strategy for navigating waitlist situations is a standard aspect of my work each year with a handful of families. Most (but not all) of those situations have resolved favorably.

I generally do not accept new clients solely to provide counsel on waitlist situations in the spring. I begin work with families at the beginning of a school year, and of course some of those students are placed on waitlists as well. I try to avoid situations in which new clients looking for just a little strategic advice might put longer-term clients at a disadvantage.

A Note on Fees

I try to be sensitive to differences in family resources, and I often adjust fees based on family circumstances. If you are committed to applying to independent schools but are concerned about my fees, please get in touch so we can discuss your situation.

A year before meeting Peter, my son had embarked on applications to boarding schools, and unfortunately was unsuccessful in gaining admission. Going into the second year of applications, for grade 10, we were anxious and uncertain.

Throughout the process, Peter provided astute insights, comfort, hope, and much humor, to both of us. Most important, Peter guided my son through every aspect of the process, from helping him identify schools aligned with his interests and needs, to helping him create his first sports video clip, right up to the March 10 decision day — when my son was accepted at six of the schools on his list.

From two years of experience, my son and I learned that applying to boarding school is far from simple. With Peter we found not only a seasoned expert, but also a friend who, at every turn and bump in the road, helped us navigate the path with the utmost care. My son is very excited to attend boarding school in the fall, and we agree that Peter’s assistance was invaluable in helping him achieve this outcome. We feel most fortunate he was the one we chose to help us in this journey.

Without any reservations, we recommend Peter to help you with your family’s journey!

—Caitlan Huang (and her son Arthur!), Albany, NY

Peter was a tremendous resource to our family throughout the school selection process. He is passionate, extremely knowledgeable about the independent and public school landscape in the Washington area, and has an extensive network of contacts — he knows many admission directors personally, and is current on the ins and outs of each school. Working with Peter was so valuable because he listened, got to know our child and our family, and was able to provide input and advice on schools that represent the best fit for our family.

—Nancy Kim and Charlie Hewlett, Maryland

Peter is one of the wisest, most insightful educators we have known. His wisdom helped our child thrive and succeed, both as a student and as a human being. He has helped countless families like ours through the school search journey, bringing sanity, good humor, and integrity to the process. He has a deep nuts-and-bolts knowledge of the process based on experience, as well as a strong understanding of each school. You won’t find better!

—Kim Berman and Farzad Mostashari, Maryland

You did so many things well. You brought schools to our attention that had not hit our radar screen, and thus opened our eyes to other potential options which would be a good fit. You did a wonderful job of helping [our daughter] fine-tune her application by asking questions, while maintaining her voice throughout. Thank you!

—Brooksley and Darren Williams, California

Guidance and questions while writing the essays was extremely helpful. I do not think I could have conveyed my child's personality as well without Peter's assistance. Peter was always available for questions.

—Lisa and Mike A., parents, Washington, DC

Peter has a unique capacity to understand students’ core talents while considering their capacity for growth. He is able to help families convey these elements of a student’s profile to admission teams, in their own writing and conversation, in reassuring and persuasive ways. Peter’s deep knowledge of schools as settings for academic and personal growth allows him to tailor his support for students and families in ways that serve families and the school communities they join.

—Alexander Levey, former Director of Upper School Admission, Sidwell Friends School, Washington (currently Director of College Counseling, Maret School, Washington)

Why me? I help families complete the process of applying to schools and school programs, and I encourage families to make solid, reasonable decisions about their children’s schooling. Rather than telling families what they should do, I work with families to develop questions that will help them understand their preferences in education, and the ways particular schools do or do not align with those preferences. In general, I don’t believe there are “good schools” and “bad schools” — instead, there are good choices and bad choices for each particular family and student.

• Success in placement. I have worked with about 400 students on school placement. Just under 90 percent of those students have matriculated at their first-choice schools; a bit over 90 percent have matriculated at first- or second-choice schools.

• Both sides of the table. I have served on admission committees that have reviewed hundreds of applicant files. I have also helped hundreds of students find placement at independent, boarding, parochial, and public school programs in the Washington area, and around the US. Few consultants in the U.S. have such extensive experience on both sides of the table in the school application process.

• All kinds of schools. I worked at independent schools near Chicago and Washington, DC for 23 years. I have experience at PK–12 schools, a PK–8 school, and a 9–12 school; at day schools and a boarding school. I have helped applicants gain admission to day schools, boarding schools, parochial schools, and public magnet schools. There are very few kinds of schools with which I do not have direct, specific experience.

• Established relationships. I have spent 20 years understanding the nuances of schools and their admission processes, and I have established relationships with admission officers in the DC area and around the US. I know how to help your family represent your children at their best, and I know the questions to ask during the process to help families apply to schools effectively. (Alas, despite this experience, it should go without saying that none of this means I can “get somebody in.”) It may help to think of my services as similar to an attorney’s: No attorney can guarantee that a court will rule in your favor, but a good lawyer can help you present your best case through knowledge of the system, its rules, and those who work in it.

Last school position My last position in a school was Middle School Head (i.e., principal) at Green Acres School in Rockville, Maryland, where I served from 2003 to 2014. I stayed an extra year as Director of High School Placement, at the request of the Head of School.

Other school roles In addition to Middle School Head and Director of High School Placement, my formal titles have included: Middle School Teacher; Director of Communications, and Upper School Head (at age 33). Other previous roles include: varsity baseball coach, yearbook advisor, newspaper advisor, dormitory master, student advisor, and Middle School soccer coach at my very first school. (I have coached baseball from age 7 through high school, but I was then, and remain now, absolutely, thoroughly, entirely unqualified to coach soccer.)

Education I earned my masters degree in education at Harvard. It was my first choice, but it turned out not to be the right program for me. I earned my bachelors degree at Wesleyan because I didn’t get into my top two choices. I loved it. I’m living proof that first choices don’t always turn out best, that there’s no magic fairy dust in the Ivy League, and that people survive rejection!

Other stuff A school application is a multi-faceted exchange of information between an applicant family and a school. I’ve always been intrigued by the ways people present and consume information — words, images, music, other arts, even video. To that end I’ve been an editor in every job I’ve ever held, whether nominally that of “editor” or not. I’ve published articles on music and sound, and my career took two brief digressions into graphic design, which is essentially the study and practice of how people interact with visual information. (The lines between professional obligation and personal interest are sometimes blurry.) I’m also a photographer, occasionally professionally; a pretty good cook; a wine and cocktail snob; an amateur woodworker; a terrible guitar player; and a music collector. I have about 3000 LPs. I understand vinyl is hip again. My children remind me that I am not.

Favorite quotations

• “When I was 14, I couldn’t believe what a fool my father was. When I was 21, I couldn’t believe how much the old man had learned in seven short years.” (Mark Twain, perhaps apocryphal, but still pretty good)

• “Believe those who seek the truth. Doubt those who find it.” (André Gide)

• “Not all who wander are lost.” (unknown)

Michael or LeBron? Michael. (I’m a Chicagoan.)

Oxford comma? In favor. Adamantly.

Beatles or Stones? Grateful Dead. Sorry, yeah, I was one of those people.

Real life I live in the Maryland suburbs of Washington with my wife and Stella, a neurotic but sweet lab/hound rescue dog. We have an adult daughter who lives in Mexico City, and a son in college.

Affiliations and memberships I am a member of IECA (the Independent Educational Consultants Association) and WISER (Washington Independent Services for Educational Resources).

Reviews To see what others say about my work, visit the Reviews page. Additional references are available.

Georgetown Day School (Washington, DC)
Georgetown Preparatory School (Bethesda, MD)
Georgetown Visitation School (Washington, DC)
Grace Episcopal Day School (Kensington, MD)
Green Acres School (Rockville, MD)
Green Hedges School (Vienna, VA)
Harbor School (Bethesda, MD)
The Heights School (Bethesda, MD)
Holton-Arms School (Bethesda, MD)
Ideaventions Academy (Reston, VA)
Landon School (Bethesda, MD)
Langley School (McLean, VA)
Lowell School (Washington, DC)
Madeira School (McLean, VA)
Maret School (Washington, DC)
McLean School of Maryland (Potomac, MD)
National Cathedral School (Washington, DC)
National Presbyterian School (Washington, DC)
Nora School (Silver Spring, MD)
Potomac School (McLean, VA)
Sheridan School (Washington, DC)
Sidwell Friends School (Washington, DC)
St. Albans School (Washington, DC)
St. Andrew’s Episcopal School (Potomac, MD)
St. Anselm’s Abbey School (Washington, DC)
St. Patrick’s Episcopal Day School (Washington, DC)
St. Stephen’s & St. Agnes School (Alexandria, VA)
Stone Ridge School of the Sacred Heart (Bethesda, MD)
Washington Episcopal School (Bethesda, MD)
Washington International School (Washington, DC)
Washington Waldorf School (Bethesda, MD)
Westminster School (Annandale, VA)

“You need a consultant to get into a school? Geez.”

—from the DC Urban Mom bulletin board, by their most prolific contributor, “Anonymous.” Not everyone needs or wants a consultant. But if you think the whole idea is silly, you probably already know the answers to questions like these that arise every year:

• What is the most common attribute of students who are offered admission at schools?

• How should you decide which schools your child should apply to?

• Who should ultimately make a decision about which school to attend?

• Should you consider that your child might repeat a grade?

• There are a lot of events — open houses, tours, virtual parent meetings, interviews, visits. Should you attend all of them, or as many as possible?

• How many recommendations should you provide for your child?

• Should you provide extra recommendations beyond a school’s requests? How many?

• You’re pretty sure that your child’s current English teacher doesn’t like your child. Should you ask last year’s teacher to write the rec instead?

• Does “test-optional” really mean optional?

• Your child’s test scores are in the 71st percentile. Should you submit them?

• Do “test-blind” schools look at testing results if you provide them? What if someone else provides them?

• Are “test-blind” schools really “test-blind”?

• If your child has undergone an educational assessment, must you provide the results to an admission committee? Should you?

• What options do you have if you think your child’s test scores are not reflective of their ability?

• What kinds of questions do admission interviewers ask students?

• What are the most important points for a parent to make in an interview?

• How much do the “essays” in the application really count?

• How much editing/proofreading help should you provide on your child’s writing? Do schools know that you’re helping? How?

• A school imposes a 300-word limit, but your writing is at 312 words after all the trimming you can do. Does anybody really care?

• Can you re-use essay responses from one school to another? Do schools compare?

• What mistake do almost all smart, educated parents make when completing the written components of the application?

• Do you need a recommendation from an alumus/a or someone else connected to a school?

• Should you solicit recommendation letters from parents of current students? If so, how many, and what should they say? If not, why not?

• If your family knows a US senator, the CEO of a Fortune 500 firm, or another influential person who could write a recommendation for your child, should you ask for it?

• Do most kids from families with pockets deep enough to build a building get in?

• Why is lacrosse (theater, swimming, chess) more valuable at some schools than others?

• How do you know if your family would qualify for financial aid?

• What is “need-blind” admission? How might it benefit you? Is there a catch?

• Is a school obligated to meet your financial aid need if they admit your child? If not, how is financial aid awarded?

• What if a school offers financial aid, but it’s insufficient?

• If you need financial aid, but you think it will diminish your child’s chances of admission, should you forego it for one year to get the admission advantage, and then apply for aid beginning in year two?

• And who pays for financial aid, anyway?

• Is there an advantage to telling an admission office that their school is your first choice? If so, when should you tell them? If not, why not?

• If your child is waitlisted, can you find out the chances of eventual admission?

• What can you do to influence a waitlist situation?

• How can you approach a situation when your child is waitlisted at their first choice, and receives an offer from their second choice?

Still want to apply on your own? Want some insights? This is for you.

If you do this yourself, I wish you success! There are three thoughts that I have come to believe are the most important things to bear in mind: Everything counts. The process is holistic. There is no formula. 

The most common misconception about school applications is that little is important beyond grades and test scores. If anybody still believed that to be the case, it certainly changed a few years ago, when some of the most competitive schools in Washington, DC announced they would no longer accept scores from standardized tests such as the WPPSI, WISC, SSAT, or ISEE as part of a student’s application. (Most are now test-optional.)

Most boarding schools are also “test-optional,” meaning that students may submit standardized test scores, but are not required to do so. It should go without saying that a student’s transcript, and the non-quantifiable factors in an application, have taken on greater importance.

At schools where test scores are either required or optional, of course those scores are still important — but they are not the only factors admission committees consider, and they are usually not the most important factor. If you doubt that, consider that every school that accepts test scores, every year, accepts some students with test scores lower than those of some students the same school rejects.

Why? Because everything counts. Because test scores are only a part of a process that is holistic. And because there is no formula.

Here’s some additional “30,000-foot” advice before you start:

Just as clients who represent themselves in court may not know the opposing attorneys and may not have seen many cases, you may not understand the differences between traditional and progressive educational approaches (hint: it’s not about politics); the ways different standardized tests are scheduled and their restrictions; when to press a family friend to write a note supporting your child’s application; or what to do with a waitlist decision. You probably don’t know Directors of Admission very well, and there is information that admission offices will not share with you because you are the parent of an applicant.

Be as open and unbiased as you can with different perspectives on school. Do not succumb to the notion, often peddled by those with axes to grind, that there are a few schools that are so special that all others pale by comparison. I am not a fan of “Top Ten Boarding Schools,” or DC schools’ “Big Three.” This is not an athletic competition, and nobody seems to agree on what those top ten or big three are anyway.

I am very suspicious of “rankings”; I have never seen school rankings from which the publisher did not seek to make a profit. The National Association of Independent Schools does not permit schools to participate in ranking schemes.

If you’re a “DIY” type, and if your child is truly in the top tier in most of the aspects of an application, a professional counselor may not add a lot of value. However, a DIY approach can also be an undertaking full of grey areas — areas in which you have many questions but have not yet developed expertise. If so, reach out and I’ll offer some advice to support your child’s applications.

For now, here you go — many of the resources and much of the insider information on successful applications.

thoughts on various topics

Here are a handful of thoughts that I’ve thought over the past couple of decades. Each link opens in its own window.

How to Find Out What a School Is Like (And Why That’s the Wrong Question)
I’m often asked “What’s that school like?” — but no school can be described from one single perspective, or in just a few sentences. Instead, here are myriad questions to help parents determine whether their child might thrive at any given school.

Why Would a Family Choose a School That Ends in Grade 8?
Some thoughts on why you might reconsider “just doing it once.”

What Are the Differences Between the SSAT and ISEE?
A factual chart. It’s long but pretty comprehensive. You’ll have to enlarge it. There’s also some good advice from Applerouth, a test prep firm, here.

Calling Teachers by First Names? Really?
There are several schools in the Washington area, and some across the country, at which teachers and students are on a first-name basis. Here’s a piece on why some schools do this, by the former head of a school that does.

Useful Web Sites

Association of Independent Schools of Greater Washington (AISGW)

Association of Independent Schools of Maryland and DC (AIMS)

Virginia Association of Independent Schools (VAIS)

National Association of Independent Schools

TABS (The Association of Boarding Schools)

Secondary School Admissions Test (SSAT)

Independent School Entrance Exam (ISEE)

Washington Independent Services for Educational Resources (WISER — a professional association)

Independent Educational Consultants Association (IECA — a professional association)

Further thoughts (formerly: twitter)

I just can’t do Twitter anymore. Instead, here are occasional articles that I’ve found helpful on parenting and schools. Perhaps you’ll find something that helps you think about your kids and their schools.

How Not to Talk to Your Kids, by Po Bronson. If you read nothing else while your children are young, this is the one to read. How I wish I’d read it before I made all the mistakes I made. (I’d probably only have made 90% of them.)

The No. 1 soft skill that predicts kids’ success more than IQ—and how to teach it. Stop worrying about how “smart” your kid is, and spend time helping them develop perseverance instead.

Lighthouse Parents Have More Confident Kids. Sometimes, the best thing a parent can do is nothing at all. By Russell Shaw, head of school at Georgetown Day School

FAQ: general questions that I’m often asked

You have lots of questions. Good. You should worry if you don’t! Here are answers to a bunch of the questions I’m asked most frequently. Each set of questions opens in its own new window.

General Application Facts

Components of the Application

Standardized Testing

Learning Disabilities and Challenges

Visits and Interviews

Other Application Topics

DC Urban Moms (and dads)

Several years back I posted several messages on the Private-Independent School Forum of the site, DC Urban Moms and Dads. I bought a hardy rain jacket and dismembership benefits. (I kid, I kid.) (Mostly.)

For the blissfully uninitiated: DC Urban Moms (as it’s usually called) is a veritable galaxy of forums, some helpful and some less so. In particular, DCUM’s Private-Independent School Forum can be a repository of misinformation, disparagement, axe-grinding, and sometimes ugly temperament. There are also some bad qualities. Perhaps that’s no surprise: In the Internet Age, everybody is an expert, and posts are anonymous, so nobody is accountable.

So what led me to register for an account under my real name?! It was part altruism — some of the ideas posted on DCUM are misinformed, and some are flat-out incorrect, so I thought I could maybe help a few earnest folks. It was part noble sociological investigation. As a friend asked when I posed the idea: “Is there any appetite for free, knowledgeable advice?”

I’m not too proud to say that it was also an attempt to see if I could engage some of the reasonable denizens (mostly lurkers, actually) who need advice on independent schools and knew to take with a grain of salt bizarre claims like, "Every kindergartner at Ideal Academy scored above the 95th percentile on the SAT!" or “Everybody knows that Washington Prep’s academics haven’t been any good since the Truman administration!”

Indeed, several parents have contacted me to say they heard me as a reasonable voice on DCUM. The topics on which I’ve posted are arbitrary — I’m fielding ground balls where they’re hit — and it’s seasonal, because there are times of the year that I can’t check in often, if at all.

If you’re interested in what I’ve had to say, click on the link below, which will take you to my posts, under my actual name. Be sure your waders are cinched up tight.